


The Daily Profit

by disapparater



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-16
Updated: 2013-09-16
Packaged: 2017-12-26 18:45:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/969023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/disapparater/pseuds/disapparater
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After yet another article in The Daily Prophet invades Harry's privacy, he writes to the owner: Draco Malfoy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Daily Profit

**Author's Note:**

> Written after my beta spotted one too many 'The Daily Profit' typos.

  
Harry's Handsome Hunk

The wizarding world's favourite hero, Harry Potter, was last  
night spotted on a romantic date with a tall and dashing gentleman.  
The infamous bespectacled man, who came out only three months  
ago on the pages of this very newspaper, took his gorgeous chap  
to the very fancy, and every expensive, The Ledbury. It's likely that  
this wasn't the first date between the two, if the smiles and touches  
that were exchanged are anything to go by. When it came time to  
say goodnight, the Chosen One leant in for a lingering kiss on the  
cheek. Hopefully he'll go a little further next time, because surely he  
doesn't want to let this handsome hunk slip away.

Editor  
The Daily Prophet

Dear Sir,

I refer to your article on the front page of today's Daily Prophet. I would be grateful if you would refrain from publishing articles about my private life in your newspaper. The evening in question was a private event between myself and the gentleman you mentioned. I do not appreciate it being relayed to the entire wizarding world. This is not the first time I have had to complain about your unwanted press attention. A retraction, while I know unlikely, would be very much appreciated.

Yours,

Harry Potter.

-

Dear Mr Potter,

On behalf of the Daily Prophet, I would like to apologise if our small article about your evening's date in this morning's paper has caused you undue distress. As a public figure and hero, you must understand the public's interest in your life—private as much as public. As a news publishing company we have an obligation to print the truth our readers want to hear about. You may dislike the attention, but it is an unavoidable part of the life of those in the spotlight. A part I can understand to varying degrees, as my name and position are well known.

With regards to your request for a retraction, I would ask if anything in the offending article was in fact untrue?

Yours sincerely,

Draco Malfoy  
Owner and Editor  
The Daily Prophet

-

Dear Mr Malfoy,

You write what your readers want in order to sell more papers. Please don't think for a minute that I believe you take seriously your “obligation to print the truth.” You print what makes you the most money. I suppose as long as that coincides with the truth, you can keep a clear conscience. But I still don't understand why you insist on writing about me so often. My life is not that interesting, I know because I live it. If you have to print articles about me, could you make them progressively more boring until people don't want to read them any more?

And yes, okay, your conscience is clear. It begrudges me to admit it, but every word of the last article is true.

Hopefully,

Harry Potter

-

Potter,

You know me well. Yes, as much as The Daily Prophet is a vessel for reaching the pubic with honest and newsworthy information, it is also my business. The aim of a business is to make money. I have no shame in admitting that. I will also admit that when your name is on the front page, sales increase by at least 28%. I can not purposefully make articles about you more dull. To be frank, they are already toned down. When we broke the news about your sexuality, we not only had your consent, but we were also considerate enough to leave out the details pertaining to your self-realisation. Today's article may have shocked you, but I'm sure our readers would have been more shocked by the details about what was being discussed over the smiles and touches, not to mention the wandering hand that went along with that kiss on the cheek.

Nothing reported was untrue, or detailed enough for you to waste your time getting upset about. You knew exactly what to expect when you sat down at that table with your date.

Honestly,

Draco Malfoy  
Owner and Editor  
The Daily ~~Prophet~~ Profit

-

Malfoy,

Damn you and your general reasonableness.

In all honesty, since you took over the paper (The Daily Profit, yes, well done) the articles published about me _have_ been less intrusive, more general and less opinionated. I suppose I should be thankful for that, along with knowing the public will likely never be done with me.

Gratefully,

Harry.

-

Harry,

I am glad you at least feel more comfortable with the articles the paper prints about you since I took over. The interest the public has in you would continue, and likely only get more uncontrollable, if information about you was not available at all.

But we don't want to write about you too much; can't have you developing an ego.

Yours,

Draco

-

Draco,

Any ego I developed would never match yours.

So, with those issues cleared up, fancy another date with me tonight?

Yours,

Harry

-

Harry,

Bocca Di Lupo, 7:00 pm.

Can I bring my photographer?

Jokingly,

Draco


End file.
